[Ask April Masini]

No — you’re not being difficult. He’s being immature. 🙁 It’s very normal for men to want their women to have only been with them and them only. In fact lots of men still fantasize about their women being virgins except for their relationships with them. Unfortunately that really limits the dating pool! 😆

If a man wants to be with a woman who’s had other relationships and dating experiences, he really needs to understand that that means she will have had good times with other men as well as bad, and if he’s mature enough, he’ll understand that those relationships have shaped and formed the woman he loves and wants to be with to be who she is now. This goes the same in reverse for women who want a man to have only been with her.

If your boyfriend is not mature enough to understand that you’ve had other experiences with men that didn’t work out but that did yield some good times that you do treasure but don’t dwell on, he’s not going to be able to sustain a long term relationship with you. Your past experiences don’t mean you don’t value him and they don’t mean you’re not loyal to him. They just mean you have a past. Some people come to a relationship with a failed marriage or children from another relationship — and not everyone can handle everyone else’s baggage, but the trick is also to have “matching luggage”. Your baggage is relatively minimal.

Unfortunately, your boyfriend needs to loosen up and understand your true feelings and genuine behavior towards him and that that includes your past which sounds very normal and healthy. If he can’t, then he’s going to have a hard time with you or any other normal woman in his future.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go. Please join me on Facebook, too. Here’s that link: [url][/url].