[Ask April Masini]

Let me clear up your confusion: He’s using you.

Friends don’t have sex with each other, so you should shake your head a little and clear that idea out of it. From his point of view: you’re ready and willing. And he can date his ex-girlfriend that he is serious about, and keep you on the side, because you don’t say no and you don’t really demand anything of him (or yourself). I hate to say this because it’s going to sound a little harsh, but the truth is that…you’ve turned into a doormat.

You’ve confused yourself by stating you have intelligent conversation 😕 as if that allows for the fact that he’s using you. (Newsflash: Intelligent men use women the same as Neanderthals.) And you think that his telling you he can’t keep his hands off you means he values you. 😳 It doesn’t. (Sexually charged men use women the same way low-libido men do.) It just means he wants to have sex with you — big difference. And he likes your company — but not as much as his ex-girlfriend he’s getting back with, and not enough to make you his girlfriend, date you or value you the way I think you’d like to be valued. He’s definitely [i]not [/i]scared of a committment — he’s uninterested. 😳 And if that isn’t the biggest mind twist, you’ve somehow decided his asking you to “take a room” in the house he’s buying is a compliment. 😯 Wouldn’t you rather he was buying the house FOR you? It sounds like he’s actually going to charge you rent for the room, too! 😯

Lots of women have sex with men because they don’t understand the differences between men and women. Men have sex because they can and women have sex as an expression of their emotions. Women often mistake sex with a guy for a relationship. Sex is physical for a man. It’s a release. Learn the difference.

If you want more from a man you have to start changing your own behavior and become the woman that men will chase after and try to win over. Essentially, you’ve thrown yourself at him and lowered the bar so that even ants can’t get under it. Read Think & Date Like A Man, so you understand how to be the woman who GETS the man — not who gets run over by him. 🙁 Here’s the link where you can download it immediately: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url] or you can buy it on the websites for Barnes & Noble or Amazon. This books is CRITICAL reading for you!

I’d love to see you win a guy over, but you’re going to have to do the work to yourself before you can. I hope this helps. Please let me know how things go, and follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter. 😀