[Ask April Masini]

Of course there’s a double standard! You can fight it or you can accept it and work with it. My advice is the latter in this case.

The main problem is that you met a man who has a job that involves working with naked women. He had the job before he met you and he didn’t hide it from you — in fact he was upfront about it with you. You decided to date him….and then you decided you didn’t like his job and asked him to change the way he did it. 😕 It was unrealistic for you to expect him to change a job he’s had that predates you, is legal, and is the source of his livelihood.

It sounds from your post like you’re a model, and this is your first nude modeling job (or partially nude, anyway). You need to decide if this is something you want to pursue because there will be men who don’t want to date you because of this kind of work (and men who do, specifically because of this work!). Rather than judge, accept and decide what works best for you in both cases — yours and your boyfriend’s.

If you can’t be with a man who’s job is spraying tan product on women for a living, then decide you’re incompatible. If your nude modeling is important to you, and more so than if it’s a deal breaker with this one guy, then choose your job over the relationship.

This doesn’t have to be a big deal if you step back and decide what it is you want in a relationship — a man who deals with nude women, a doctor, a businessman who works in an office, a janitor or a sports figure — among other jobs. This may be a place for you to learn more about what’s important to you — and what’s important to this guy you’re dating, too.

I hope this helps, and that you’ll join me @AskAprilcom (no dot!) and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].