[Ask April Masini]

It’s time to make your move. She clearly likes you a lot, but wants her cake and to eat it, too. She wants to have her boyfriend, but keep you on the side — to herself! She’s got a control issue and that rears it’s head when she tells you that her smoking is going to be a secret the two of you keep from her boyfriend. It rears it’s head again when she doesn’t want you to be her sole boyfriend, but she doesn’t like you dancing with other women.

You’ve got to step it up and let her know that you want her for yourself and if she’s all yours, you won’t be dancing with other girls in clubs at night — you’ll be dancing with her. If she can handle being a relationship with you, you want to date her — exclusively. No secret smoking club. No tantrums in nightclubs. Just a full on relationship. If she can’t handle that, then she needs to take care of her own business and cut you off if being around you as a friend is too painful. Let her know you get it that she’s attracted to you, and you’re ready and willing — as of right now. Let her know that you understand your own value and if she wants in, this is the moment.

Your strength and resolve are going to be very attractive to her. But if she’s just not mature enough to handle a real relationship, you’ll know it by her response.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go. And join me on Twitter @AskAprilcom (no dot!). 🙂