[joegamer1]

[quote=”April Masini”]Thank you for the updated information — that really helps a lot to give a clearer picture of what’s going on.

This young woman you’re involved with online is actually correct not to update her relationship status because you haven’t dated. She doesn’t know you except as a man she met online, and that does make a difference in a relationship status. For now, you’re both single and you should really BE single — including your online social media status.

As for her emotions, she’s a 17 year old teenager — and, she’s still a child. Sometimes they look and act like adults, but they’re not. And, they tend to be hormonal. 😉 If she’s fantasizing about love, romance and marriage with a man she met on the internet, that’s understandable. Many young girls do this as they grow up. You shouldn’t take it too seriously that she think she wants to get married because after all, she’s just a young woman who’s probably in high school. I’m not a person who generally harps on age differences, but because she’s a teenager and you’re a grown man, you’ve got a lot of life experience that she doesn’t have, and that experience gap is more important than the age gap. If you were dating in person, you’d probably be picking her up from school or after school activities like cheerleading practice or debate club meetings. This would make the reality of your experience differences, more viable. The internet and no dating, tends to make it easier to fantasize her as older than she is.

My general advice when there’s online, long distance dating, is always to accept that the internet is a wonderful tool for meeting people, but if there isn’t a date within three months of meeting online, to move on. There are wonderful marriages that result from online, long distance relationship meetings, but there are also many people who use the internet as a place to escape reality and avoid personal problems because the internet allows a separation that in person dating doesn’t, and that distance keeps people from getting to know each other well.

Also, it’s way too soon for anyone to meet parents, because there hasn’t been a date yet. If you want to ask permission to date their 17 year old, you can contact them yourself. Otherwise, the rule of thumb I advise for any dating is that you should use the first three months of dating (in person) to decide if you want to continue seeing that person. The second three months should be used to decide if you want to be monogamous. After that, is a good time to meet the parents. Before that is jumping the gun. 😉

I hope that helps.

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I understand now why she isn’t updating her relationship status. That is why after 2 weeks when I asked her to update her relationship status she said she declined for a reason and then I said ” If u don’t want to update Facebook relationship status, you can just make your single status invisible from everyone for the time being. I will also do the same.” she said ” since when are we dating . I swear you haven’t asked me out. You just assumed”. So basically she expects to date me in person first. Do u think she might be dating other men as well ? And if I found out about that what should I do then. Also a day or two ago I indirectly asked her what would be her parents reaction when I visit your home because they did not approve earlier. She understood that I wanted to meet her parents and was annoyed at that or may be she was annoyed because she understood that I wanted her to update her relationship status.
She said she wants to have kids with me . But as you said she is still young teen. I think you want to point out that she is still under 21. So she needs time to understand her feelings. I have heard that relationships in which men are older than their wives work as good as same age relationships. What is your opinion in my case.
You said about that rule of thumb of three months. So in my case would you advice me to break it off with her ? Because i haven’t date her( in person) yet even after four months of meeting online. She and i did want to meet but because I live in another country so I have to take care of some things here before meeting her. She is ready to meet me anytime.