[Ask April Masini]

Before you can be in a relationship that works, you have to be ready. It sounds like you have some personal problems you have to deal with first, before you can be in a relationship. Because you’re not dealing with them first, you’re having relationship problems.

I know you want to go to school, but you can’t have everything at once. Your first priority needs to be a job that supports you. After you have a job that allows you to pay rent in your own place or in a place where you have a female roommate, THEN you can begin to go back o school, but for now, first things first. Job, your own place or a place with a female roommate, and then college and/or a relationship — but in that order!

The complication here is that If after five years of dating your boyfriend, he hasn’t proposed marriage, and is chummy with his ex-wife, it sounds like he’s not ready for marriage and may not be for quite some time — or ever. Here you are living with him, and you’re complaining about his ADD (that’s not going to get better) and his friendship with his ex. You can do better — but you have to get your own act together before you can. At your age, it’s time to move on and find someone who’s ready for a serious commitment, but the truth is, you can’t move on until you get your own life together.

I hope that helps! Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].