[April Masini, your AskApril]

I was with you all the way up until you wrote:
[quote]I beg for him to let me go, let me leave, take a break but he does not do so….it will take me to change my number and block him to get him out.[/quote]

I understand you’re alone, you’re probably still hormonal and emotional from the pregnancy termination, and you don’t trust your boyfriend and are disappointed in him. But…. you are a 28 year old adult! Get on the phone, look online and get the local newspaper and find female roommate situations so you can move out as soon as possible. Living together when you’ve only been dating for 5 months, and you’ve been through so much negativity, is a terrible situation for both of you. So move out.

Second, stop looking to someone else to do for you what you need to do for yourself. (I know this may seem tough given that from your point of view you haven’t done anything wrong; I’m not blaming you; I’m giving you your marching orders so you can be more independent and chose a boyfriend more wisely, and not under or out of duress.)

Third, stop dating anyone. Altogether. You need time to heal yourself, make some friends, get a support group going in your new city, take some exercise classes, clean your closets, read a novel, go to the movies with friends, and adopt a pet! In other words, get a life without a boyfriend, for now.

When you start feeling happy, settled and that you’ve processed your feelings, THEN you can begin dating again. If you do so before hand, you’re going to make dating mistakes. Get your own life together first. Get healthy. Find a way to stop feeling like a victim in a new city with no support.

And when you do start dating, BUY BIRTH CONTROL!! 😯 You shouldn’t be getting pregnant like this. And that goes for your boyfriend, too! You both have to take responsibility for using birth control if you’re having sex and don’t want a baby.

I hope your boyfriend will slow down when it comes to dating because he moved way too fast with you and it created a mess. He wasn’t ready for you to live with him and I’m not sure the two of you should even be dating at all — but we’ll know the definitive answer to that question AFTER you do what I’ve said above. If you do, and he’s still around and interested, and so are you, I hope you’ll both take things SLOWLY.

Hope that helps!