"April Masini answers questions no one else can and tells you the truth that no one else will."

Re: My fiance’s potential child

#16648

You’ve got a major problem on your hands and you should stop trying to get pregnant until you resolve this issue. 😕 DNA testing is very accurate, and if the test proves he is not the father then it’s time for him to start separating from this child who has a biological father somewhere. It’s not fair for him to confuse the child. It’s fine to be a family friend who shows up at birthday parties and even sends Christmas presents, but if your fiance wants to start his own family with you, he needs to clear up this potential chaos first. His ex-girlfriend is not his ex-wife or the mother of his child, and since she’s trying to interfere in your relationship with him, and there is no reason for her to be in his life any more, since he’s not her child’s father, it’s time for him to step away from his old life, and start his new one with you.

If he is not willing or able to do this, YOU have to recognize he’s not compatible with you.

I know you want a child, and I’m guessing (since you didn’t mention your age) that your biological clock is ticking like Big Ben, but that is not a good reason to rush into something as important as getting pregnant. Slow down. Do it right.

Make sure you’re with a man who is compatible and available. Get married first. Apparently you have a ring, since you said he’s your fiance. Now make a date and get married. I trust you live together, and if you don’t, move in together so it’s crystal clear you’re a married couple. And after these steps, start trying to get pregnant.

I hope this helps. It would be a shame to make a mess of things where children are involved. Let me know how things go.

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