[Ask April Masini]

You can’t fix your husband. He can’t commit to you. He can’t commit to his stripper. YOU are the only one YOU can fix. The problem is not your husband. It’s your inability to move on — and I don’t mean to sound harsh because I think you’re in a difficult situation with three children and a ten year marriage that has failed, but if you don’t pick yourself up and give yourself a new life without him, you’re going to dig yourself a deeper hole.

It’s very sad when a relationship ends, but feelings are not enough when you have a family. Behavior and character can make or break a relationship, and yours is a perfect case. Regardless of the feelings you and your husband have for each other, you’re creating a chaotic home for your children. His leaving and leaving and leaving is not worse than your taking him and taking him in and taking him in. Your home is a revolving door. You have to stop the cycle of chaos and create a stable and consistent home for your children.

Divorce is not worse than chaos for kids, so quit the chaotic trio with your husband and his stripper lover and get divorced, get a custody order so you have structure for your children, and YOU move on emotionally so that you can end your marriage and find love with someone who is stable and loyal and loving.

I hope that helps.

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