If you want to chase feelings, then go after Kyle. You’ll have your “feelings” sated until he leaves or you have drama …. AGAIN. 😕 You already have a history and a pattern with him. It’s up and down and in and out.
When you want a mature relationship with a guy you can count on, the other guy is the one you will go after. I think you understand this intellectually, but you’re lusting after the drama you have with Kyle.
Don’t be too hard on yourself for wanting what you want — but understand why you’re doing what you’re doing so you understand that when he leaves you and the two of you break up again, and your “feelings” are dashed, why they are.
People who chase feelings and leave when the spark goes out don’t provide stable environments or relationships for themselves, any future children or for career and work. Chasing feelings is fun and sexy, but it’s not something you can bank on. Balance is the key here, and I trust you’re figuring this all out so you can eventually have just that. 😀
