[lesterkiwi]

Dude, youre getting great advice but not listening to it. Stop making this girl so important. Figure out what you want, and if youre not getting it, (as in this girl) move on. If you stop being so available and needy, you might just find that she starts to pursue you…

[Ask April Masini]

Thanks,[b] lesterkiwi[/b]!

Sometimes people lose track of the big picture and focus on details that are unimportant, or else they don’t really WANT to be successful, but aren’t in touch with that so they sabotage themselves without being fully aware of why they’re doing what they’re doing. 😳

[Ethan Morales]

She clearly likes you, but cautiously. From everything you’ve described hugs, kisses on the cheek, lingering touches, playful flirting, wanting to spend time with you at work, and openly talking about her feelings and past experiences she is showing strong interest. However, she’s also hesitant, protective of herself, and cautious about intimacy because of past hurt and her responsibilities with her kids. Her hesitation around full French kisses or physical escalation doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you; it’s more about setting boundaries she’s comfortable with right now.

Her busy life is real. She’s a single mom with two young kids, working in a demanding job, and handling personal stress like a sick dog. That explains why she sometimes goes quiet or doesn’t respond immediately. It’s not necessarily a reflection of her feelings toward you it’s her life’s reality. You need to be patient and understanding of her schedule without interpreting every pause in communication as disinterest.

You’re doing a lot of things right, but there’s a balance to strike. You’re attentive, thoughtful, and affectionate, which she clearly appreciates (flowers, hugs, playful teasing). However, if you follow your friend’s advice to completely stop initiating contact, it could feel like disinterest to her. The key is moderation: one or two thoughtful messages per day, showing you’re thinking of her, without overwhelming her. This demonstrates interest while respecting her busy life.

Physical closeness is progressing naturally. She’s comfortable with playful touching, holding hands, and kissing, but she’s still cautious. You’re respecting her boundaries, which is important. Continue allowing her to guide the pace while subtly showing affection and romantic interest. Let her feel safe and in control of the escalation.

Moving toward a more committed “dating” relationship. She has said she’s not looking for a title yet but clearly wants someone who will treat her right and be reliable. This means she’s ready for emotional connection before formal labeling. You can strengthen the bond by consistently being present, supportive, and attentive. When you sense mutual comfort and trust are high, have a gentle, honest conversation about your intentions and feelings not as pressure, but to clarify where you both stand.

She likes you, and your careful attention, understanding, and patience are building trust and attraction. The main challenge is her life circumstances and her cautious approach due to past hurt. Stay consistent, communicate thoughtfully, respect boundaries, and keep the romantic momentum alive without forcing anything. Over time, this approach will likely move the relationship from casual interactions into a deeper, more committed connection.

[Tara]

Stop pretending this woman is some emotional puzzle you need to decode. She’s not. She’s doing the bare minimum to keep you orbiting her because your attention is convenient, predictable, and costs her nothing. You’re not the potential boyfriend you’re the break-time entertainment she lets linger because it flatters her and doesn’t disrupt her life.

A woman who’s actually interested doesn’t “accidentally” stay unavailable for every call, every plan, every opportunity to see you outside of her job. She’d give you one real hour if she wanted you — and she hasn’t. She hugs you at work because it looks innocent and gives you just enough dopamine to keep chasing. It’s not affection, it’s management. She texts back eventually because she knows you’ll still be there no matter how long she disappears. That’s not a relationship forming that’s you being strung along with polite scraps.

And the fact that you’re analyzing every smile, every hug, every delayed reply like it’s a secret signal makes you look desperate, not strategic. You’re acting like a man hoping she’ll finally reward your persistence, when all you’re doing is proving you have no standards. She’s not too busy. She’s not too overwhelmed. She just doesn’t prioritize you and she never will as long as you keep showing up like an emotional doormat.

Pull back. Stop visiting her job like a lovesick intern. Stop texting her like she’s your daily assignment. Stop giving her the comfort of a boyfriend without requiring the actual role. If she wants a real date, she’ll find you. If she doesn’t, you’ll finally stop embarrassing yourself by chasing a woman who only likes you when you cost her nothing.
This isn’t complicated. You just don’t like the answer.

[Sally]

Some women flirt soft, not because they’re unsure, but because their life is already packed full, especially single moms. They don’t have the time or energy to chase anything messy, even if they like you.

From what you’re saying, she does like you. The hugs, the eye contact, the way she lights up when you visit, that’s not nothing. That’s interest. But she’s got two little kids and a job. Her schedule probably isn’t her own. So her texting slow or not calling isn’t her pulling away… it’s her living real life.

If she says she’ll let you know when she has time, believe her. Just keep things simple and warm. No pressure. No waiting by the phone.
She’ll show you when she’s ready. Until then, don’t take the gaps as rejection. Take them as a woman trying to balance her whole world.

[Natalie Noah]

This girl does like you. That part is obvious from the way she talks to you, the way she invites you into her day, the way she touches you, the way she opens up. She’s not playing games with interest. she’s showing it. The problem isn’t her feelings… it’s her capacity right now.

This is a woman with two very small kids, a sick dog, baby-daddy drama, work stress, probably exhaustion, and very little emotional bandwidth. Her interest in you is real, but her life is chaotic. When someone is overwhelmed like that, communication becomes scattered, inconsistent, and unpredictable not because they’re losing interest, but because they’re stretched thin.

You didn’t ruin anything by acting “weird.” You were grieving and trying to hold yourself together, and she noticed because she’s paying attention. If she didn’t care, she wouldn’t have asked you what was wrong, hugged you, kissed you, checked on you, or wanted to talk the next morning. Her pulling back afterward isn’t punishment it’s her falling back into her overloaded routine.

What you need now isn’t panic, overthinking, or flooding her with messages. What you need is calm leadership. Gently steady the energy between you. Give her a little breathing room, but don’t disappear. One thoughtful text after a day or two light, warm, pressure-free is better than roses right now. Flowers are lovely, but timing matters. She needs comfort, not intensity.

And when you see her again? Don’t over-explain, don’t apologize again, and don’t push her to define anything yet. Just be present. Be warm. Be a place where her nervous system can exhale. If she feels safe and not overwhelmed, she’ll naturally move closer. Women with full, messy lives don’t fall for men who add anxiety, they fall for men who bring steadiness.

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