[Hkdfls]

So I’ve been working with this girl for almost a year now and we have become extremely close. When we first started together, I was in an unhappy marriage and am now going through separation & divorce. She is also in a relationship of 10 years but he just wants to travel while she is ready to settle down to do the house and kids thing. She’s told me that once everything is settled and I get my house back that I need to have a party as she wants to come over and have a few drinks. She always points out our similarities and of late has started specifically comparing me to her partner in the fact that I know her too well and “just understand & get her” compared to him. We are best friends on snapchat even though her partner has it and she also insisted I add her on Facebook & Messenger when I told her my wife was not accepting the fact I was leaving her (as she knows I wasn’t allowed to have female friends in real life or social media). She always sends me funny stuff through messenger even though she has shared them on facebook and knows I would see it there. A few people have told us we’re cute together and when we go out to get lunch people always assume we’re together and don’t want to pay separately. I’ve always assumed this meant people observed a good chemistry between us. We also go away as a part of our work so we spend a lot of time together having dinners & drinks. On our most recent outing, she was instigating a lot of touching and at one point I even noticed her ever so gently bumping her butt into mine while enjoying the live band. While walking to our rooms, I had a sudden urge to put my arm around her waist and as I did that she did the same to me and pulled in tight while walking side by side the whole way back. While it may seem like a sure thing, I don’t normally get much attention from girls, let alone the pretty ones as I’m quite a shy guy and don’t normally put myself out there so this is quite an odd occurrence for me.

[Ask April Masini]

She likes you and she wants to date you, but she is waiting for you to make the first move. 😉 When she told you that when “everything is settled” she wants to come over and have a few drinks, that was her clue to you that she wants you to take care of business with your wife, and become single so she can date you. When a woman tells you she wants you to have a party so she can come over and have drinks with you, that’s your clue! 🙂

If you want to make a move now, you can. She may push back and ask you to wait until you’re divorced or are not living with your wife — or she may go for it now. But unless you try, you won’t know. I know you’re in a marriage that is ending and dating is new to you, but some things have not changed. The guy making the first move may seem traditional and old school, but it’s the fall back position for a lot of people. And it really sounds like it is for her. She’s looking to you to let her know when you’re ready. 😉

I’m not sure how close you are to divorce or living as a separated person in a divorce, but if you are close, I think you can give it a shot. Invite her out on a date. Dinner, just the two of you, and tell her it’s a date. If things go well, make your move. If that kind of formality gives you pause, then you can simply make a move — and see what happens. But rest assured — she’s interested in you as a romantic partner. Game on (if you want it to be). Your move.

[PassionSeeker]

It really sounds like something deep is brewing between you two — and I can tell this connection means more to you than just friendship. The chemistry, the shared understanding, the little moments — they’re hard to ignore, especially when you’ve both felt unseen or unfulfilled in your current relationships.

But here’s the thing: timing matters just as much as connection. You’re still healing and untangling from your marriage, and she’s still in something long-term that’s clearly complicated. Those blurred lines can start to feel intoxicating, but they also get messy fast if no one’s emotionally ready for what might come next.

If it were me, I’d slow down a little. Enjoy the bond, but try to keep some space until you both know where you truly stand. If it’s real — if she feels it too — it’ll still be there when things are clearer. You deserve something that starts clean, not tangled up in guilt or confusion. Sometimes the hardest thing is not acting on something that feels right until it is right.

[Ethan Morales]

This situation is emotionally charged and you’re right to pause before doing anything. From what you’ve described, there’s undeniable chemistry between you two: the mirroring, the touches, the private jokes, the fact she shares content directly even when it’s public all that points to a strong, mutual attraction. But it’s happening while both of you are still emotionally attached to unfinished chapters your divorce, and her long-term relationship.
Here’s the truth: she’s showing romantic interest, yes but she’s also testing boundaries without formally crossing them. That means she’s curious, drawn to you, and possibly unsatisfied where she is. But until she takes real steps to end that relationship, it’s all potential energy, not something solid. Acting on it now might give short-term excitement but long-term confusion.
You also need to be careful about timing. You’re still transitioning out of a marriage, and that emotional vulnerability can make this connection feel even stronger than it might be in normal circumstances. Sometimes, what feels like deep chemistry can partly come from shared loneliness or the comfort of being seen again after a long time of not feeling that way.
If I were you, I’d do two things: first, take care of your separation fully get grounded, know where you stand, and give yourself emotional clarity. Second, talk to her honestly once you’ve done that something simple like, “I really value our connection, and I don’t want to blur lines while we’re both still figuring things out, but I feel something real here.” That honesty will show maturity and give both of you a real chance at something genuine when the timing’s right.
Bottom line: the connection’s real, but the foundation isn’t ready yet. Don’t rush it; build it clean. If she truly wants you, she’ll still be there when you’re both free to start something without guilt or secrecy.

[Sally]

I’ve been in that kind of almost-something before. It feels real because it is, just not always in the way we hope. You two connected when both your lives were coming apart, and that kind of timing can feel like fate. But sometimes it’s just two people holding on while things change. Try not to turn every moment into a sign. If it’s meant to be more, it’ll still be there when the dust settles. For now, be honest with yourself about what this really is, not what you wish it could be.

[Val Unfiltered💋]

oh babe… that’s chemistry doing laps around both of you 😏 but careful, ‘cause it’s also messy territory. she’s basically half-in, half-out of her thing, and you’re still raw from yours. that mix feels electric now but can burn quick later. she clearly feels the pull too, but until one (or both) of you is fully single, it’s all flirting in limbo. don’t be the rebound, be the reset. let her sort her life out first. it’ll still spark after the dust settles. 💋

[Tara]

You’re acting confused because it’s easier than admitting you’re walking straight into a mess you helped create. This woman is not subtle she’s bored in her relationship, she likes the emotional attention you’re feeding her, and she’s testing how far she can push it without having to take responsibility for anything. She’s giving you just enough flirtation to keep you hooked while keeping her real life intact, and you’re eating it up because you’re starved for validation after a dead marriage. Here’s the reality you’re avoiding: if she wanted you, you wouldn’t be deciphering hints like a teenager, she’d make a move once her relationship was actually over.

Until then, you’re the emotional side piece she gets to flirt with guilt-free because you’re too shy to call it what it is. Stop letting her use you as a distraction, back off, and tell her clearly that you’re not playing this gray-area game unless she ends her relationship and if she won’t, then stop pretending you’re “not sure where you stand” when the answer is obvious: you stand on the sidelines because that’s where she put you.

[Sally]

When you’re coming out of a marriage and someone suddenly sees you, laughs with you, touches you, it’s easy to feel like fate is nudging you. And honestly? She’s giving you signals. The problem is she’s giving them from inside a ten-year relationship she hasn’t left.
That’s the part you can’t ignore.

She might like you. She might even imagine something more. But she’s still with her partner, and as long as that’s true, all the cute moments and late-night chemistry don’t mean anything solid. They’re just feelings floating around with nowhere safe to land.

If you make a move now, you risk becoming the guy she leans on instead of the guy she chooses.

Give her space to sort out her life first. Let her be single before you let your heart get ahead of you.
You don’t have to rush this. If it’s real, it’ll still be there when she’s free.

[Natalie Noah]

Alright… let’s take a moment and break this down carefully. From what you’ve described, her actions are giving very clear signals of romantic interest. The subtle touches, the way she compares you to her current partner, the insistence on connecting with you on social platforms, and the way people perceive you two together all of this points to her being emotionally and physically attracted to you. It’s not just chemistry; it’s a pattern of behavior that shows she enjoys your company in a way that goes beyond friendship.

What April Masini’s advice is really highlighting and what I agree with is that she’s waiting for you to initiate. She’s creating an opening for you to act, but she’s also respecting the fact that you are still in a complicated situation with your current marriage. Her comment about having a party “once everything is settled” is a gentle, playful way of telling you she’s ready to step in once you’re free, but it also leaves room for you to test the waters now if you feel ready. Essentially, she’s signaling: “I like you, and I’m hoping you’ll make the first move.”

you’re at a crossroads where clarity and courage matter more than overthinking. You can either invite her out on a clear, intentional date even something casual like dinner or drinks or you can keep waiting and risk ambiguity dragging on. She’s giving you the green light, and it’s up to you to decide when to press the gas. Trust your instincts here; the signs are unmistakable that she’s interested, and the only thing left is for you to step forward and see what develops.

[Author]

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