Sometimes what you think is cruelest is actually most helpful. By that I mean, you don’t want to leave him in his time of need, but if you don’t, you’re enabling this behavior he has of doing nothing. 🙁 I think you have to tell him that you miss the man you started dating three years ago, and that while you believe he is capable of losing weight, taking the steps to get out of his depression, and going out to have fun — you can’t make him do these things. He has to do them himself.
Then, you have to start taking care of yourself. In a way, you’re being a role model for him by doing this. You don’t want to get sucked into the vortex of depression, so you need to start going out and having fun. If he wants to change, he will, but if he doesn’t, you can’t help him by staying.
I’m sorry because I know this is hard, but you have to do hard work in relationships in order to be healthy, and sometimes leaving is the kindest thing you can do.
Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].
