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Very Lost & Confused…please help

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  • #3752
    jessie11
    Member #39,183

    Hi everyone, i really hope you can help me.
    I was in a relationship with this guy for five wonderful years. During last year we started working together and things started to fall apart. I started to think that I didnt want to be with him anymore and I ended up starting this affair with another guy. I treated my boyfriend like absolute crap and became the most horrible person. This affair lasted several months until I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend and choosing the new guy over him. My boyfriend didnt know anything about the affair but slowly he pieced things together and worked it that I had been cheating on him.
    Meanwhile I had started this relationship with the other guy and my boyfriend was completely heartbroken and distraught. Anyway, it has been a little while since this all happened and i am currently in a relationship with the new guy but the truth is i cant see myself with him for the rest of my life. when i look into the future i see my ex. i am still inlove him and in love with the new guy.
    i have that much guilt for what has happened it makes me sick to the stomach. i hate myself for what i have done.
    but what do i do? do i stay in the relationship thats lots of fun but doesnt feel like a long term thing or do i leave him and try to patch things up with my ex? please help me

    #17755

    It sounds like you want a long term, monogamous relationship and this new guy is not Mr. Right, given your criterion for yourself. That’s why I advise you to let him go so you can be open to finding Mr. Right. When you waste your time with the wrong guy, you close yourself off from men who may be much better for you, so let this guy go.

    As for your ex-boyfriend, it sounds like you learned a few things about yourself and relationships and hopefully, you will be able to use those lessons in your next relationship to evolve not just yourself, but the relationship.

    I don’t think you’re as lost and confused as you are disappointed and sad that you treated someone badly and let him go, and now you wish you hadn’t. 😳 Decide to be a better person and a better girlfriend by knowing yourself better so you can put yourself in situations that work for you and when they don’t, you can do something about them. 🙂 I hope that helps.

    Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

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